Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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