I just saw a hot homeless man
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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