FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Less talking, more tequila
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize