Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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