Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
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I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
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Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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