Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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