I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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