i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
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We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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