some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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