she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize