when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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