I am puke
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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