There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize