I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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