my vag is so smooth its legendary
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize