Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize