You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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