Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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