This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
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No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
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I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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