That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize