Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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