omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize