Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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