he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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