It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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