Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.

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(908): Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution. http://tfl.nu/ms1p

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(815): View more from Illinois

This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.

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(815): This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing. http://tfl.nu/2ksa

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(612): View more from Minnesota

and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling

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(612): and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling http://tfl.nu/vkmi

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(646): View more from New York

You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.

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(646): You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine. http://tfl.nu/zb6r

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(647): View more from Ontario

on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..

(1-647): View more from Ontario

who won?

(647): View more from Ontario

THAT is your concern right now?

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(647): on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest.. (1-647): who won? (647): THAT is your concern right now? http://tfl.nu/f9cv

Replies (14) Good night (4624) Bad night (631)
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(313): View more from Michigan

So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.

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(313): So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial. http://tfl.nu/zbd1

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(302): View more from Delaware

in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am

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(302): in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am http://tfl.nu/qmyh

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(330): View more from Ohio

Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag

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(330): Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag http://tfl.nu/ebgx

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(+64): View more from New Zealand

Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.

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(+64): Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking. http://tfl.nu/52no

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(773): View more from Illinois

Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day

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(773): Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day http://tfl.nu/fpi9

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.

(502): View more from Kentucky

Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.

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(502): I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this. (502): Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward. http://tfl.nu/u5vx

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(563): View more from Iowa

I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.

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(563): I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took. http://tfl.nu/2cez

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(402): View more from Nebraska

You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit

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(402): You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit http://tfl.nu/nx74

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(980): View more from North Carolina

You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.

(336): View more from North Carolina

Haha hell yea

(980): View more from North Carolina

Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.

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(980): You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday. (336): Haha hell yea (980): Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday. http://tfl.nu/pa5o

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(907): View more from Alaska

Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador

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(907): Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador http://tfl.nu/015q

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