MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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