meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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