plz talk dirty to me
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I think people are normalizing furries
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