Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
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just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
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But theres a keg here and me gusta
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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