Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
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I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
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If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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