Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
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