I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
then he tried to convert me to islam
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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