I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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