Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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