I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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