dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize