what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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