I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
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She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
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For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize