ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize