Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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