just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
farters have to be the big spoon...
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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