I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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