Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
His hands were made for my vagina.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
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