his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize