Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize