Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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