Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again. http://tfl.nu/sc3c
  Replies (5) Good night (1386) Bad night (391) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell

  (310): View more from California

  my version of bright and sunny.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell (310): my version of bright and sunny. http://tfl.nu/6mbu
  Replies (4) Good night (1647) Bad night (440)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church http://tfl.nu/2izr
  Replies (15) Good night (1676) Bad night (2239) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have. http://tfl.nu/ze45
  Replies (8) Good night (3224) Bad night (1020) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (580): I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence. http://tfl.nu/vucu
  Replies (18) Good night (6622) Bad night (861) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets http://tfl.nu/vdn6
  Replies (14) Good night (940) Bad night (3705) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable http://tfl.nu/dvma
  Replies (14) Good night (5980) Bad night (917) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life. http://tfl.nu/g4gg
  Replies (35) Good night (2565) Bad night (3553) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over. http://tfl.nu/vab8
  Replies (13) Good night (821) Bad night (3839) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me http://tfl.nu/r4q8
  Replies (12) Good night (985) Bad night (6879) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode. http://tfl.nu/19jg
  Replies (6) Good night (1065) Bad night (2791) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit. http://tfl.nu/0gcq
  Replies (21) Good night (787) Bad night (1221) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening. http://tfl.nu/bdxc
  Replies (7) Good night (1579) Bad night (242) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package. http://tfl.nu/50h2
  Replies (3) Good night (782) Bad night (267) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now. http://tfl.nu/crnu
  Replies (2) Good night (268) Bad night (934) Order T-Shirt

Randomize