That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
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Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
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Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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