I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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